Pearls of Wisdom

Learn from your Mistakes

You want to approach life as a skill, to realise that there is always the possibility of doing things skilfully. You may not have perfected it, but you don’t beat yourself for not having the perfect response to every situation. You realise that there’s always the opportunity to learn. You make mistakes, you learn from them. This is a normal part of life, and a wise way of living is to learn from your mistakes and resolve not to repeat them. Learn from what you’ve done. Notice when you do things correctly, notice when you make mistakes, and take that information to adjust your patterns of behaviour.

Some people come to the practice and say, ‘Well, this is the kind of person I am. I’ve just got to be this way.’ That attitude closes the door on the practice entirely. You start from where you are, but you have to be willing to change. If people couldn’t change, if they had to stay the way they are, the Buddha’s teaching would be in vain. There would be no reason to have the teachings because they’re all about transformation. They’re all about learning, developing, changing the way you approach life. From the Buddhist point of view, ‘accepting yourself’ means not only admitting where you are, but also accepting that you have the potential to change. As your approach becomes more and more skilful, you’re doing less and less harm to yourself, less harm to others, less harm to both. You find that you live in a way that brings more benefits for yourself, more benefits for others, more benefits for both. It may take more energy, more attention, but it’s a much more worthwhile way of living.

—Ṭhānissaro Bhikkhu ‘Skills to Take with You’ (Meditation 1)